Show us how you would have us be

12:11 a.m. Saturday
Why am I sitting here at midnight updating my blog? Because Colburn is in the emergency room in Abilene -- alone, without me. [Gotta stop, the phone is ringing.]

Okay, I'm back. That was him - still sitting in the ER. So anyway, he called around 9 to say he'd be "out of pocket for awhile'. (Usually we talk for an hour or two on Friday and Saturday nights.) When I asked what was up, he told me he'd hurt his arm. Felt something in it snap. We were afraid it was broken. He sounded like he was about to faint from the pain. He was on his way to the ER.

About 20 minutes later he called back to say the ER was full of people so he went back home. Luckily he only lives about a mile from the hospital.

To make a long story short, he's back in the ER waiting his turn. Now he thinks it's probably a snapped tendon or ligament inside his right elbow.

I called Joanna to tell her I probably won't be going down to visit this weekend. She understood and sympathized.

Damn, he lives too far away. This reminds me of when his sister died and I couldn't go comfort him. Damn. Damn. Damn. I absolutely HATE this.

I told God this evening that He has to find a way for us to be closer so we can take care of each other. I can't for the life of me figure out how to do it. There's a prayer for couples in Illuminata by Marianne Williamson with a section that says:

Let us always remember that in each other we
have the most beautiful woman, the most
beautiful man,
The strongest one,
The sacred one in whose arms we are repaired,
May we remain young in this relationship,
May we grow wise in this relationship,
Bring us what You desire for us,
And show us how You would have us be,
Thank You, dear God,
You who are the cement between us,
Thank You for this love.
Amen.