Little House

Final Post

2010-08-19T16:43:00.001-05:00

On June 12, 2010, I moved from Fort Worth to Abilene. It was a long process, taking six years or six months, depending on how you look at it.

This post is written more than two months after the move, so my feelings about the move are poignant and teary-eyed. At the time the move was hot, frustrating and exhausting.

Since I don’t want to dwell too much in the past, here’s a parting photo: Thomas patrolling the grounds of Little House for the last time.

On a lighter note, join us on our new blog from West Texas where Thomas and I have truly lost our marbles!

The Laurel Tree

2010-05-19T19:15:00.000-05:00

The Laurel Tree

A ballpoint versus fountain pen video.

2010-03-17T12:30:00.000-05:00

A ballpoint versus fountain pen video.

The Secret Of Kells - Promotional Trailer

2010-02-27T13:24:00.001-06:00

Another cool video

2010-02-09T22:02:00.000-06:00

Found this on Neil Gaiman's blog. He's the guy who wrote Stardust.

Annie & Lukas

2010-01-26T22:16:00.004-06:00

Getting her baby doll ready to party

I had the honor of giving Annie her first baby doll - on the occasion of her 4th birthday:-)

Sleepy Lukas had to have his own baby

Happy Birthday, Maggie Blue!!

2010-01-24T10:41:00.002-06:00

Snow day project - finding vintage Pyrex

2009-12-29T18:56:00.003-06:00

Colburn said he had an old box of dishes from his sister's estate that we needed to go through. She had inherited some stuff from their mother. He thought there might be some old Pyrex in there. As our snowday project we hauled it in from the storage shed and look what we found!

Thomas helped us unpack the box. His favorite part was rooting around in the packing paper.

Snow drifts for Christmas

2009-12-25T11:00:00.001-06:00

A hot meal on Christmas Eve

2009-12-25T10:56:00.001-06:00

Colburn delivering Meals on Wheels in the blizzard on Christmas Eve. A lot of drivers cancelled, so we subbed for them. Imagine not having a hot meal at Christmas. Many people were surprised to see us. (I stayed in the truck and checked names off the list. Hey, someone's gotta do it;-)

Silent Monks Singing Halleluia

2009-12-17T12:08:00.001-06:00

FABulous!

Yellow Mandala with Gothic Arches

2009-12-15T22:19:00.001-06:00

Two things I learned this afternoon

2009-12-07T17:00:00.005-06:00

85 percent of women who are sexually harassed don't react immediately due to shock.

Some cities are very sensitive to these issues including Washington D.C. (believe it or not), but evidently the good ol' boys in Cowtown have not caught on.

Footnote: I recently filed a sexual harassment complaint against a man in a professional organization I belong to. He is NOT a coworker at the office. I was interviewed by an HR consultant today who was very supportive, sympathetic and informative.

Evidently I CAN draw. Who knew?!

2009-12-01T20:49:00.001-06:00

Even though I have a degree in art and have spent most of my career doing creative work, I never thought I could draw. Evidently I was wrong.

Mandalas

2009-12-01T20:40:00.006-06:00

Artist Peter Max - Color and Creativity!

2009-09-21T07:51:00.001-05:00

Sesame Street - My Martian Cutie (Number 9)

2009-09-10T07:26:00.001-05:00

Sesame Street: Celebrities Sing Alphabet Song

2009-09-10T07:03:00.001-05:00

This will put a smile on your face:-)

Going Out of Business

2009-08-30T19:41:00.006-05:00

As of two minutes ago, CH Web Design, formerly known as Good Works Web Design, is now officially closed. It's taken me a year to get to this point and while I'm not having second thoughts I am a little bit sad. What happened two minutes ago? I emailed final invoices to my two remaining clients.

I've had my business since December 1999. Wow, that's a long time. For the first seven years it was called Good Works Web Design. Then in 2006 I let a business consultant convince me to change it. A decision I regret a little bit.

It's a shame the web design business in general never evolved. A reliable and affordable web designer/developer is as hard to find today as it was 10 years ago. There's as big a gap in the market now as there was in the late nineties. This baffles me. A couple of months ago, one of my competitors tried to get me to stay in the business. It struck me as ironic because I've been referring my clients to him for more than a year now.

So now, perhaps, I can do something with my evenings besides sit in front of a computer, if I can get away from Facebook.

Sesame Street - Capital I (HD)

2009-08-24T22:22:00.001-05:00

Remember this? Cute and haunting at the same time.

Nora The Piano Cat: The Sequel - Better than the original!

2009-08-22T21:42:00.001-05:00

Dear God: Today I am thankful for...

2009-08-16T21:26:00.001-05:00

...grace

Dear God: Today I am thankful for...

2009-08-05T23:04:00.003-05:00

...our book club that has been meeting for five years this summer. Tonight we realized some of our best discussions have been on books we don't like. How cool is that?

Cathy and Sue, we missed you!

World Science Festival 2009: Bobby McFerrin Demonstrates the Power of the Pentatonic Scale

2009-08-05T21:54:00.001-05:00

Way cool!

LOVE STORY (Taylor Swift) meets VIVA LA VIDA (Coldplay) - Piano Cello - by Jon Schmidt

2009-07-21T07:10:00.001-05:00

Dear God: Today I am thankful for...

2009-07-09T18:12:00.000-05:00

...air conditioning in my car, in my home and at my job.

Dear God: Today I am grateful for...

2009-07-07T21:59:00.003-05:00

...grandchildren in my house and daughters who are wonderful mothers.

In honor of tonight's full moon

2009-07-06T22:44:00.003-05:00

"Well, I've wrestled with reality for 35 years, Doctor, and I'm happy to state I finally won out over it."

~Elwood P. Dowd

Mayo Clinic Enewsletter - a few excerpts

2009-06-30T22:22:00.002-05:00

I get the Mayo Clinic enews, and these were some links under the "Now Playing: Video" section. Can you say "ick?!"

Barium enema:
See how a barium enema is done.

Colonoscopy:
See what takes place during a colonoscopy.

Toccata & Fugue in D Minor

2009-06-24T16:38:00.001-05:00

Are they musicians or dancers?

Hammer Pants Dance (HD)

2009-06-19T07:06:00.001-05:00

High School, May 1972

2009-06-11T19:40:00.004-05:00

Just found an old friend from high school on Facebook.

She sent me these pics today.
Girlfriends from back in the day.

Dear God: Where did you put my jaw line?

2009-06-08T08:15:00.003-05:00

Okay, God.
Where did you put it? My jaw line. I used to have one but now I can't find it anywhere. These people will give me a new one, but gee, I don't know if I have enough $$ in my cookie jar. And besides, I'm really not into pain these days.

Christi

P.S. Next time we're talking about stomach muscles. Some women have more than their share, and I never got any.

Dear God: Today I am thankful for...

2009-06-02T18:50:00.001-05:00

Fred, my adopted father

Eye Candy for My Girlfriends

2009-05-30T17:25:00.004-05:00

Dear God: Tonight I am thankful for...

2009-05-29T22:16:00.003-05:00

Zipply little convertibles with 300 watt Bose radios, Janis Joplin, a boyfriend who's an excellent driver, the big West Texas night sky and a second chance to live a full life

Dear God: Today I am thankful for Thomas Jefferson

2009-05-27T20:21:00.002-05:00

"For here we are not afraid to follow truth wherever it may lead."

Thomas Jefferson

Thirsty Kitty

2009-05-25T11:27:00.003-05:00

Colburn thinks Thomas is spoiled.
I don't know where he gets that idea.

Dear God: Today I am grateful for the interrobang

2009-05-22T16:12:00.006-05:00

Today's punctuation lesson:
This ?! is called an interrobang.
Who knew?!

Here are the examples provided by Wikipedia. Go here for more info.

How much did you spend on those shoes?!
You're going out with whom?!
They did what?!

I wish I could take credit for this discovery, but I stole it from Cathy's Facebook update.

Next punctuation lesson: Who can tell me what Guillemets are?

Bunnies and tweets

2009-05-21T22:04:00.003-05:00

Susan and I have noticed lots of bunnies in the neighborhood. We think that's much better than critters from the rodent family.

Twitter, Facebook and Blogger. Do I really have that many words?

Kids Say the Darndest Things - ART LINKLETTER

2009-05-17T17:38:00.001-05:00

Remember when we looked like these little kids?

Dear God: Today I am grateful that...

2009-05-14T19:41:00.005-05:00

...I've never had cancer and that I get to meet awe-inspiring survivors like Cynthia.

Cynthia knew she had breast cancer even though five doctors told her she did not. If she had listened to them, and given in to the bullying and arrogance of two of them, she would not have been diagnosed until Stage 3 or 4 rather than at Stage 1.

After her mastectomy, she was fired from her job for not returning to work soon enough. Her employer claimed she voluntarily terminated her position. The results were no unemployment benefits and no COBRA insurance. She was 55 years old, a single woman, unemployed and with no insurance -- and undergoing agressive cancer treatment. The kind of treatment that makes you wish you were dead.

Her dearest friends were compassionate and helpful for awhile. She discovered cancer diagnosis, treatment and recovery goes on so long that your friends burn out and run out of energy. Then they don't come around so often anymore.

She had seven surgeries in nine months including breast reconstruction. When she was finally willing to let a stranger touch her again, she went for a massage at Cancer Care Services where she broke down in tears on the massage table.

The compassionate massage therapist listened for a very long time and then sent her downstairs to meet with one of our social workers. Through her sobs, Cynthia told Jane that she just couldn't do it alone anymore. Jane said, "Oh my goodness, Cynthia. You don't have to do it alone anymore. We have so much we can do to help you."

That was a year ago, and today I got to spend time at my job hearing her story. She's upbeat, funny, compassionate and a real fighter. What a gift to meet her. And tomorrow they give me a paycheck! How cool is that?

Dear God: Today I am thankful for...

2009-05-13T20:13:00.009-05:00

The invention of dry cleaning

Agustin, who mowed my yards while I was at work

Booze in a bucket

Shower Dragons and Old Nonsense

2009-05-07T22:31:00.011-05:00

Beware of dragons

For you are crunchy and good with ketchup

If you know me well, and most of you do, you might think I'm dark. You're right; I do have a dark side with which I'm quite comfortable. If you also think I'm fatalistic, you're wrong.

I'm also clean because I just got out of the shower. What do those two things have in common? Shower dragons. That's what I call those critters that I bump into late at night in the shower. You know them: the voices in your head that remind you of all the mistakes you made during the day. The ones that bring up regret over something you did, or didn't do, 20 years ago.

I should've gone to see Elise in the hospital when her baby was born with Down's Syndrome 20 years ago.
I wish I'd visited Grandmother more often in the nursing home.
I shouldn't have told my coworker about that party I went to.
When did my marriage die and why didn't I see it?
Am I a horrible daughter and sister?
Do my children blame me for the divorce?

The dragon roars are louder the tireder I am, and they're noticeably vicious late in the week and close to the full moon -- like tonight.

Then I remember this quote which I keep in the window above my bathroom sink, and it sets everything right again:

Finish each day and be done with it.
You have done what you could;
some blunders and absurdities have crept in;
forget them as soon as you can.
Tomorrow is a new day;
you shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.

~Emerson

V'là l'bon vent

2009-05-05T22:12:00.001-05:00

The Free Spirits book club is reading "The Girl With No Shadow" by Joanne Harris. I found a link to this song on Joanne Harris' website.

High Five Escalator

2009-04-14T22:05:00.001-05:00

Why I woke before the alarm

2009-04-07T06:50:00.002-05:00

Those pesky neighbors, the ones with guns and drugs, had a little excitement at their house early this morning. Those are not party lights, they're police cars, firetrucks and at least one ambulance. Thomas and I even got to see flames coming out of the house. Their name is Friends. Go figure.

Op zoek naar Maria - Dans in het Centraal Station van Antwerpen

2009-04-06T07:23:00.001-05:00

Pay close attention to #18

2009-03-28T18:22:00.000-05:00

F u n n y B u s i n e s s
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
19 lessons that it took me 50 years to learn

by Dave Barry

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping
pill and a laxative on the same night.

2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason
why the human race has not achieved, and never will
achieve, its full potential, that word would be
"meetings."

3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and
"mental illness."

4. People who want to share their religious views
with you almost never want you to share yours with
them.

5. And when God, who created the entire universe
with all of its glories, decides to deliver a message
to humanity, He WILL NOT use, as His messenger, a
person on cable TV with a bad hairstyle.

6. You should not confuse your career with your life.

7. No matter what happens, somebody will find a
way to take it too seriously.

8. When trouble arises and things look bad, there
is always one individual who perceives a solution
and is willing to take command. Very often, that
individual is crazy.

9. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get
up and dance.

10. Never lick a steak knife.

11. Take out the fortune before you eat the cookie.

12. The most powerful force in the universe is gossip.

13. You will never find anybody who can give you a
clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight
savings time.

14. You should never say anything to a woman that
even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant
unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her
at that moment.

15. There comes a time when you should stop expecting
other people to make a big deal about your birthday.
That time is age 11.

16. The one thing that unites all human beings,
regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status,
or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we
ALL believe that we are above-average drivers.

17. The main accomplishment of almost all organized
protests is to annoy people who are not in them.

18. A person who is nice to you, but rude to the
waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important.
Pay attention. It never fails.)

19. Your friends love you anyway.

The Windmills of Your Mind

2009-03-25T20:14:00.000-05:00

Are they adorable or what?

2009-03-16T20:09:00.006-05:00

Dalton the Birthday Boy

Dagan the Little Man

Lukas the Chick Magnet

Annie the Queen of Fashion

Day Two Report

2009-03-03T22:04:00.003-06:00

I've had two full days on the new job at Cancer Care Services (www.cancercareservices.org). As I've told friends who have asked, it's been the most relaxing two days I've had in WEEKS. I knew when I first walked in the door for my initial interview that it was a place of healing. Not just for our clients but for me as well, I hope. The last two weeks on the previous job were quite stressful ('nuf said on that). I miss my friends over there and sincerely hope to stay in touch with them, but it was time to move on.

I want to say a special thanks to Colburn and Susan for being so supportive during the transition. Their love and encouragement is one of the constants in my life and I can't possibly express what that has meant. If you know either or both of them, you know what I mean.

Eye Candy for My Girlfriends

2009-02-16T21:56:00.002-06:00

Crush

2009-01-25T19:18:00.009-06:00

I know I'm arriving late to this party, but I'm just now watching an episode of 30 Rock*. (I know, I know -- but sometimes I'm a late bloomer.) I must now confess that I have a girl crush on Tina Fey. I've heard her described by men as that hot grad student you fall in love with.

This goes along with my crush on Rahm Emanuel. I first heard about him when he and his brothers were interviewed on Charlie Rose last summer. One brother is an oncologist and bioethicist and the other is a Hollywood talent agent on whom the lead of Entourage is based. Rahm is said to be the inspiration for the role of Josh Lyman on The West Wing.

* Julie told me a couple of years ago that I would like it and, for the record, she was right.

My Book Pile

2009-01-11T21:16:00.003-06:00

In no particular order, on the living room end table:
Fowl Play, Evanovich
Three Cups of Tea, Mortenson
Outliers, Gladwell
A Mercy, Morrison
Dewey, Myron
Dr. Andrew Weil's 2008 Annual Edition, Weil

Beside the bed:
Tribute, Roberts

What's in your pile? Leave a comment

Sisters Night Out - with no kids!

2008-12-31T09:45:00.003-06:00

Joanna and Maggie enjoy a Sisters Night Out at the Radio City Christmas Spectacular featuring the Rockettes at the Frank Erwin Center in Austin.
Before the show, they had dinner at the Eastside Cafe.

Can you tell they're related?

Winter Arrives

2008-12-21T09:05:00.003-06:00

Colburn's front yard on Thanksgiving 2007

December 21 is the first day of winter 2008.
Percy Bysshe Shelley said: "O, wind, if winter comes, can spring be far behind?"

Life is a Highway

2008-12-20T08:15:00.005-06:00

While I watch some of my friends rolling along life's highway in the Hallmark Christmas lane, I find myself spending time in the other lane. I'm not sure what to call it; perhaps a descriptive phrase will come to me before the end of this post.

Within the past few days I've watched one friend struggle with serious health problems involving treatment that makes her feel worse before she feels better. She's going home for the holidays so she can go to bed and let her mother take care of her.

Another friend is struggling with her husband's unemployment (especially difficult during a gift-giving holiday), her health problems for which she can't afford the necessary treatment and her self-centered mother. She's in that uncomfortable place where she has to receive gifts with a gracious smile while not being able to give any in return.

Earlier this week I had dinner with my ex-step-father-in-law who is watching his beloved wife depart inch-by-inch into the hellhole that is Alzheimer's. While he sits at her bedside he recalls that 28 years ago he nursed his first wife as cancer took her away too soon and too painfully.

My daughters and I just found out their father and my ex-husband is engaged. This was a very big surprise to me, and I can honestly say I'm weirdly not upset or saddened by the news. I'm kinda waiting for the second shoe to drop and grief and tears to start but, ya know, I don't think it's going to happen. I wish him well and hope they will be happy together.

I don't mean this post to be depressing or anti Christmas. I'm just observing that life doesn't stop for the holidays; some people just travel through them in the other lane.

"I got my Lion cut and and I am READY TO PARTY"

2008-12-09T22:48:00.002-06:00

"Must Haves" List for Cold & Flu Season

2008-12-07T12:08:00.005-06:00

For single people everywhere, this is what you must have in your cabinet because you won't need it when your friends are awake and willing to run to the store for you, you'll only need it at 2:15 a.m.:

Nyquil
Pepto-Bismol
Chicken Noodle Soup
Saltine Crackers (plain and boring so you won't eat them all ahead of time)
A Zicam Product (if you're a believer)
Kleenex

What would you add to my list? Please leave a comment.

Annie & Her Butter Sandwich

2008-12-01T22:25:00.004-06:00

It's really cute but it also makes me queasy.

I'm Thankful for Roses for Thanksgiving

2008-11-24T20:51:00.002-06:00

Happy Bday, Andy!

2008-11-21T16:48:00.003-06:00

(I know Andy doesn't read this, but I bet his mother or sisters will forward it to him.)

Happy Birthday to Andy, my birthday buddy!
Andy, I remember when you turned 16 on the day I turned 32.
I'm 54 today, so that must mean you're 27. haha heehee
I hope you have many, many more filled with laughter, joy, and good health.

Love, Christi

Kay Ryan, U.S. Poet Laureate

2008-11-16T22:32:00.003-06:00

What a delightful discovery!

Kay Ryan will change your opinion of modern-day poetry.

I love this song

2008-11-16T17:10:00.004-06:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ur5AYncDDE0

It's the song in the new Dell commercial. iTunes lists it in the Children's genre.

"Museum-quality northern liberal" goes to Abilene

2008-10-29T20:31:00.006-05:00

On Oct. 18 Colburn and I went to see Prairie Home Companion perform at Moody Coliseum on the ACU (Abilene Christian University) campus. Who woulda thought? GK (Garrison Keillor) described himself as a "museum-quality northern liberal" in the early part of the show as he himself wondered what he was doing there.

I won't repeat moments of the show here because, as the saying goes, you had to be there.

What I will hesitantly admit is that it was a very moving experience for me. As I listened to the audience sing songs that I haven't heard in 30...40...no...45 years, I flashed back to sitting in my seat between Grandmother and Grandad at Woodlawn Church of Christ and singing "Just As I Am." As Colburn knows, hearing 4,000 people sing that hymn a cappella made me cry.

Those of you who know me well know I have little contact with anything or anyone from my childhood. My own mother doesn't remember it - partly because of her mental health and partly because she just wasn't interested. My grandparents are dead, and my father and I are estranged. So, I never, ever expected to sit there in a basketball coliseum and fall in love again with Abilene, see the wisdom of the practices of the Church of Christ, and weep while singing an old-fashioned hymn. I only went to the show for laughs, to see a minor celebrity, and have a good time.

I think it moved the tectonic plates underneath my life.

If you want to hear audio clips of the show, go here.

To read GK's article in the International Herald Tribune about his two days in Abilene, go here.

The photo above is of the Women's A Cappella Choir from ACU with Jearlynne Steele, guest performer with Prairie Home Companion. (I like the choir better than her.)

Yes, I picked up an armadillo

2008-10-13T21:53:00.005-05:00

The weekend after we went to the balloon fest, I did two rounds in the armadillo races. It was the evening of the Rentech sales meeting (Colburn's company), and we had dinner at Perini Ranch Steakhouse in Buffalo Gap. The prime rib was fantastic, the margaritas were dangerous and the entertainment afterwards was...well...memorable. The emcee of the races said the best way to get your 'dillo to run fast was to blow up his butt. However, you'd have to stand on your head to do that, so most of us just pushed 'em along. My first race went pretty well; I came in second. Okay, there were only three contestants. In my second race, I got a baby armadillo, and evidently it was way past his bedtime. He just plopped down and wouldn't move. Baby armadillos are cute and squishy. I guess their shells don't harden until they get older. Now you know. See the photo album here.

One more thing: I also had my picture taken with a 44-year-old black buzzard. Her name is something like "Vera." She's been on Letterman and Leno and travelled all over the world. I've been to Buffalo Gap.

Abilene BalloonFest

2008-10-13T21:13:00.001-05:00

What a wonderful night. There was no wind, and we were so close to the balloons that they almost singed our eyebrows. It was breathtaking!

My lawn guy = My hero [and tidbits about Julie & Kim]

2008-09-24T22:21:00.008-05:00

Have I told you I have a lawn mowing guy now? Agustin Moreno. I've never met him, but he's my Hero of the Week. It is sweeeeeet to come home from work and find my lawn freshly mowed. Thank you, Nancy and Joyce, for the recommendation.

It would be entirely appropriate to post a picture of my freshly-mown yard, except that I'm sitting here in my bathrobe and it's dark outside and I'm getting sleepy. Pretend this picture is my lawn.

As a former resident of Little House, Kim understands better than anyone what a blessing a lawn guy is over here.

Oh, and one more thing: I got to see Julie two days in a row last weekend. And her adorable kids (one of whom is my godson - guess which one, haha) and her handsome husband who actually blew me a kiss. Yes, Jim. Long story. Ya had to be there.

sigh

2008-09-15T09:12:00.003-05:00

I'm tired of always saying good-bye to Colburn. It used to be like ripping off a bandage; the pain was intense but brief. Not so much anymore. Now it's like ripping off an arm. Bad analogy, I know, in light of his ruptured distal bicep tendon and subsequent painful recovery. Today's full moon probably isn't helping:-(

True Confessions and Shameless Bragging

2008-08-27T22:37:00.002-05:00

[I better post something before the blog police get after me. You know who you are!]

Since the theme of this blog is to tell the truth, here goes. The book club is meeting here next week and I'm a little anxious. Not a lot, just a little. I don't generally enjoy having house guests, so therefore I just don't. Have them, that is. Part of my concern is that I'll be at Colburn's for the long weekend and won't return until Monday evening. Since I work 8 to 5 that just gives me Tuesday evening to get ready. It was a huge relief when I decided to have Scampi's cook the food. As Nancy said, "Oopah!"

Now all I have to do is pick it up after work that day. The evening before I'll do the last minute stuff like vacuuming and maybe dusting -- or I'll just dim the lights. Right now my immediate concern is getting the lawn mowed. The terrific book club ladies referred several lawn companies to me. I called the man who does Nancy's and Joyce's lawns. He gave a great estimate and is sending his brother tomorrow. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

The next question about the dinner is plastic plates or my great-grandmother's fine china. Hmm...

Now for the shameless bragging
Maggie and Adam's good friend Felimon is a TERRIFIC photographer and has heartstopping new pix of Annabella Blue on his website. Scroll down and see the little girl after the door photo. There she is. Isn't she amazing?

The only thing worse than daytime TV...

2008-08-22T20:17:00.003-05:00

...is daytime Olympics. How do I know this? Because I've been home with the stomach flu since Wednesday evening. It's Friday evening now and I'm watching the USA vs. Serbia water hockey game, or whatever it's called. Colburn and I have observed that many of the Olympic sports are simply a variation on getting the ball into the net. IMHO*, there is only one game of that type that is worth watching: soccer. I'm sure Adam and Annie would agree.

I mean, really, one beach volleyball game is one too many.
Now, swimming and diving is different. After all, men in Speedos!

*In my humble opinion

How lucky am I?

2008-08-09T19:39:00.011-05:00

There's been so much going on the last three weeks that I'm not even going to attempt complete sentences in paragraphs. In chrono order:

Colburn pinned by 400+ lb. motorcycle
Right bicep tendon torn from lower arm
Emergency trip to Abilene instead of trip to Elgin & San Marcos
Next weekend at San Marcos River with kids/grandkids
Cold, cold water
Annie and Dalton calling me Grandma thus getting anything they want
Lukas and Dagan laughing, cuddly and sweet smelling
Maggie, Adam, Joanna and Danny are smart, fun and loving to their kids and me
Back at the office - produced Trinity Habitat's first Annual Report in 8 years, only their 2nd in 19 years. Got lots of kudos for my work
Took time off from work to care for post-op Colburn
Lots of pain, his from the surgery, mine from watching him suffer. Fair amount of tears on my part. Lots of gratitude and affection on his part.
He gets better every day. Thank God.
Five days and five nights together = a real and rare blessing
Sweet grandchildren, loving children, and a man who adores me and treats me that way.

How lucky am I?

I'm your virtual wife

2008-07-27T15:59:00.004-05:00

I'm sitting here in Colburn's living room while he takes another nap. Because of his Lortabs and unrelenting pain, not only in his right arm but all over his body, his mood alternates between jittery, grumpy and concern about me. His right arm isn't bruised but there's a dent where his bicep should be and his lower arm is swollen. That probably means he tore the bicep tendon.

We went to the bookstore and Best Buy (where I fell in lust with the 24-inch iMac) just to get out of the house and then stopped by Chili's for a late lunch.

While eating I was thinking about how to rearrange my schedule this week. We won't know until he talks to the doctor(s) tomorrow how soon he will need surgery. As of last Thursday, I'm now eligible to take my vacation days. I was hoping to use them on a trip together and a day or two with the grandkids. But life comes at you pretty fast, so being flexible is a powerful virtue to practice.

Of course he doesn't want me to miss work or use vacation time, but I told him I'll be here for him. I also said, "I'm your virtual wife, so I'll be here." He's a man of few words and many Scottish grunts, so he grunted. Hmmph.

I'm feeling a little isolated out here in the dry and windy boonies, but it beats the socks off being at home and totally unable to help him. I don't think I'd be able to stay away, so that means I'm in the right place.

Timothy Leary would be pleased

2008-07-26T18:34:00.002-05:00

Remember when Timothy Leary said "better living through chemistry"? Well, Colburn is proof of that today. He's in pain from his torn bicep and/or tendon. He alternates between exhausted and a little stoned from his Lortabs.

An hour ago he was obsessed with cleaning his dry erase board in the kitchen. Then he wouldn't stop looking for the earbuds to his MP3 player. Now he's reading the Star-Telegram for the second time since I got here. And now he's dancing along with Paul Simon's "Kodachrome". Oops, there he goes outside to turn on the water sprinkler "for the birdies."

It's gonna be a long weekend, dear readers. hahaha

Show us how you would have us be

2008-07-25T23:58:00.004-05:00

12:11 a.m. Saturday
Why am I sitting here at midnight updating my blog? Because Colburn is in the emergency room in Abilene -- alone, without me. [Gotta stop, the phone is ringing.]

Okay, I'm back. That was him - still sitting in the ER. So anyway, he called around 9 to say he'd be "out of pocket for awhile'. (Usually we talk for an hour or two on Friday and Saturday nights.) When I asked what was up, he told me he'd hurt his arm. Felt something in it snap. We were afraid it was broken. He sounded like he was about to faint from the pain. He was on his way to the ER.

About 20 minutes later he called back to say the ER was full of people so he went back home. Luckily he only lives about a mile from the hospital.

To make a long story short, he's back in the ER waiting his turn. Now he thinks it's probably a snapped tendon or ligament inside his right elbow.

I called Joanna to tell her I probably won't be going down to visit this weekend. She understood and sympathized.

Damn, he lives too far away. This reminds me of when his sister died and I couldn't go comfort him. Damn. Damn. Damn. I absolutely HATE this.

I told God this evening that He has to find a way for us to be closer so we can take care of each other. I can't for the life of me figure out how to do it. There's a prayer for couples in Illuminata by Marianne Williamson with a section that says:

Let us always remember that in each other we
have the most beautiful woman, the most
beautiful man,
The strongest one,
The sacred one in whose arms we are repaired,
May we remain young in this relationship,
May we grow wise in this relationship,
Bring us what You desire for us,
And show us how You would have us be,
Thank You, dear God,
You who are the cement between us,
Thank You for this love.
Amen.

It Takes a Village To Raise a Child

2008-07-25T23:17:00.006-05:00

[I promised when I started up this blog again that I would tell the truth, so here goes.]

There's an old African proverb that goes like this: "It takes a village to raise a child." When my girls were growing up, there were three women who helped raise them, who were their second mothers so to speak. The women of our tribal village in the midst of the Metroplex. The only one that is still a big part of their lives is Susan.

Susan has been the sister I never had and more family to me than my own blood relatives. She probably knows that, but what she doesn't know is that she was also my role model for being a mother to daughters. You see, when I was a young married woman, I told God I wanted sons because my relationship with my mother was so difficult. And God, in his infinite wisdom, gave me daughters. The experience of raising girls has been what Erica Jong would call "exorcising the mother demon."

I put my daughters first for 20 years and did a pretty good job with them, along with Wesley who is a loving, supportive, and patient father and husband. Then, as most of you know, in 2004 I had to do something drastic to put myself first, even though it would hurt my grown children. If you've been divorced, you know the intensity of divorce pain and the subsequent guilt. I know I will carry this guilt to my grave. It has lessened a little bit over time, but it rears its ugly head from time to time.

I humbly admit I envy women whose families are intact. Marriages are living organisms which means sometimes they die, and it's no one's fault. That's what happened to mine -- arguably 8 years before I moved out of the house. It died and I didn't know it. And once I saw the truth, I couldn't do anything about it except move on.

Now when the girls come to visit they need a place to stay that isn't a painful reminder, a sanctuary from the reality of the divorce. So, they stay at Mike and Susan's Bed & Breakfast. It's like Disneyland for grandkids over there. I'm so very grateful that Maggie and Joanna and their growing families have a comfortable, loving and welcoming place to stay.

But, damn, it hurts, too. Each time they come to town, I have to work hard and stay in my right mind about the whole thing. As Michelle reminded me at lunch today, it's not a reflection of my mothering that they don't come to my house. They prefer to go to Susan's. I have to remember to put M & J first and be grateful they have a place where they are comfortable and happy.

It's not about me. Right? It's about them, my little girls. And what they need and want.

Thank you, Susan.
xoxoxo

Go here to see the It Takes a Village book by Jane Cowen-Fletcher.

From girlfriend to grandma in one afternoon

2008-07-20T21:41:00.005-05:00

At 3:15 this afternoon, Colburn and I were loading his truck for his return home when Joanna and the boys zipped past en route to Mike & Susan's B&B. Joanna had decided to make a quick trip up to visit with her friend and bridesmaid Jessica. Yes, I knew they were coming and was surprised because I'm going down to spend next weekend at her house. Wow, a chance to see her, Dalton, and Dagan on two weekends in a row!

First of all, she looks FABULOUS. All that baby weight has disappeared as a result of a lot of hard work on her part. The boys are adorable, of course. Dalton has turned into a regular little boy having lost most of his baby fat. He was fearless playing outside with Mike and later, me. Dagan, however, is the roundest little kid I've ever seen. I don't have any pictures of the afternoon because I wanted to play with the little ones without hassling with a camera.

It's 9:47 now and I'm exhausted. It's been a busy day. First, Colburn and I went to a kayak demo in Pappy Elkins Park in Dalworthington Gardens this morning. It was great fun but I'm not used to that much sun. I haven't rowed since I went to camp when I was about 13 years old, but I did pretty well. The first kayak I went out in was a pedal one with a rudder. I felt like it turned me into a duck. I was paddling all over that little lake. Then we rode in a tandem kayak. It was more work but the people on shore said we did well.

I feel like I'm rambling here and not the least bit clever, so I'm going to sign off. The weekend was a real gift having spent time with Colburn, Joanna, Dalton, Dagan, Mike and Susan. It doesn't get much better than that.

Special message to Julie: I'm trying to stay in deep denial about your move but not succeeding.

All that worry for nuthin'

2008-07-18T15:28:00.004-05:00

After two or three weeks of stress at work I have to re-learn a lesson: things work out the way they're supposed to.

I've been up to my eyeballs in deadlines - grant applications, newsletter & annual report production.
Then there's the air conditioning problem. My office is in the back of the building and all the a/c blows in the front offices, so the average temp in my office, in the mid-afternoon, is probably 85 or so.
And, last but definitely not least: my first job performance review was today. On a Friday afternoon in the middle of the summer. Is there a more tiring time? Anyway, it was a glowing review and lasted only about 15 minutes and resulted in a humongous (for a nonprofit) bonus.
Then there's the ongoing car trauma. See Texas Lemon Law.
Oh yeah, one more thing: 100 degree days. Hot time in the city.

Like I said, all that worry for nothing.

I'm going to buy a horse

2008-07-15T22:16:00.000-05:00

I picked up my car today. I am now the proud owner of a new oxygen sensor, motor mount, and left axle, and it only cost me $803.72. Susan said it well when she found out: "shit."

The voices in my head have been very active today. As Anne Lamott (one my favorite authors) would say, "If Jesus knew what I was thinking, he'd drink gin straight out of the cat dish."

What are the voices in your head saying? Please leave a comment.

Quote for the day: "Onward through the fog."

My day in bullet points

2008-07-14T22:13:00.000-05:00

Took my car to Vandergriff Honda. Turns out my blown-out tire had a leaky valve stem AND a nail. That explains a lot.
I also had my oil changed while I was there, and when I drove back to the office my "Check Engine" light came on.
Took car back to Vandergriff after work, got rental. Now driving a Toyota 4Runner. Way too much car for me. The car saga continues...
I talked to Dalton today. He actually said, "Hi, Grandma!" on the phone and then told me about his favorite TV show, "The Backyardigans", although he calls them the "mimis". Don't ask me why; it's a two-year-old thing. I love it when babies turn into people.
Colburn still manages to take my breath away. It'll be four years next month. Time flies when you're ... well, you know.

Okay, okay

2008-07-13T20:50:00.000-05:00

So, last week at book club we were talking about blogs and my dear friend, and previous inhabitant of Little House, Kim said she stopped reading my blog because I wasn't posting words, just videos. I told the group that blogging is tricky for me because I believe writers are mandated to tell the truth. At least that's what Stephen King and Anne Lamott say, and I figure they should know since they've published a whole lot more books than I.

I've decided to blog the truth about the following subjects:

Being 53
Being a divorced grandmother
Being a long distance grandmother
Being a single woman
Vodka drinks
And just being a grown up in general

Let's start with the most timely subject - the downside of being a single woman.

Today on my way home from the grocery store I had a blowout on westbound I30. I didn't realize it was a blowout until Susan used the term. Now I know. Car trouble is one of the issues that can send a normally competent single woman into a real tizzy. Luckily AAA got there within 30 minutes and sent me on my way. They put a rush on it because I was a stranded woman in a very dangerous situation - at the beginning of the exit ramp from I30 onto Cooks Lane. People were zipping past me so fast it shook my car.

Then I decide to throw my principles out the window and take my car to Walmart's Tire and Lube Center. Once there I learned they had 14 cars ahead of me so I went back home. Forget that, I'll just go first thing in the morning. At home I discovered my little spare donut tire only had 15 psi when it should have had 60, so I took it over to Wonderful Mike's to air it up. Unfortunately he could only put 25 psi in it so I still had to take it somewhere else and air it up myself. Keep in mind, Dear Readers, that it was 98 degrees outside while all this was going on.

All this time I was fretting that I'd have to buy new tires but don't know what kind, I'd be late to work tomorrow morning, and that Colburn lives way too far away when I need him most (that's the worst one) .

When I got home, I had my melt down. I'm sure you know what that means: uncontrollable, irrational crying. The ugly kind that makes your sinuses swell so bad you can't breathe for the rest of the day. The kind that makes you curse the fact that you're single. It was what I now call a Bad Single Woman Moment (BSWM). Not to be confused with BDSM!

All this was following a weekend of watching Susan's grandchildren run all over making noise and showing way too much energy. That always makes me miss my grandchildren something fierce and relive the dire consequences of divorce. It also opens the Empty Nest wound again.

The upside of my day was drinks, queso and guacamole with Michelle. I didn't want a 'rita like I usually get, but I have very little bartending experience so I asked the waiter to tell the bartender I wanted a fruity drink with vodka. He sent me a Cape Cod*: vodka, cranberry juice, slice of lime. Very yummy and not nearly as heavy as a margarita. I highly recommend it to anyone - man, woman, married, single, grandparent or not.

Cheers.

*How is this different from a Cosmopolitan? Please share your favorite summer drinks by posting a comment.

Alison Krauss and Robert Plant Duet for Raising Sand

2008-06-15T10:04:00.001-05:00

Bryn Christopher - The Quest

2008-05-24T09:36:00.001-05:00

Fabulous new song from the season finale of Grey's Anatomy. Took me days to find it. Not even released until June 9.

Welcome, Lukas!

2008-05-17T11:42:00.000-05:00

It's a boy!

Lukas Blue Martin Wagner

Born May 1 at 9:38 am
7 lbs, 7 oz; 20.5 inches

We're all doing well and big sister Annie is a great help!

Love,
Adam, Maggie, Annie, Lukas

[Note from Grandma: Maggie's hard labor lasted about 20 minutes.
Surprised everyone, including the doctors and nurses!]

My Valentine to Habitat

2008-02-20T22:25:00.000-06:00

It seems to me that a lot of people use the new electronic journal aka blog as an excuse to rage against the system. Sometimes it's a political rant, especially during election year, and often it's a daily journal of everyman's life. More and more frequently, sometimes with unintended disastrous results, it's a rant against a big business and/or employer.

I'm here in the late night of a lunar eclipse to tell you how much I love my new job and the company I work for. Several months ago when my job search was at a standstill, a friend suggested I choose several companies that I wanted to work for and market myself to them. Being a self-employed web developer, I looked first at my clients. The one that immediately stood out was Trinity Habitat for Humanity. They do undisputed good work in the community, are good stewards of their money, and are just plain cool people. I'd known some of them for several years and thought to myself, hey I want to work there. At that place, for that cause, with those people.

Fast forward now, this weekend will be the end of my first month. Like a new love affair, the first days were heady with frequent emails to friends saying, "It just keeps getting better." The cynic in me has watching closely for the dark side, but I'm here to tell you, my friend, that I'm more in love with this company than I was before I started working here.

Today, I met others who are involved with Habitat: a donor, a house sponsor, a former affiliate board president from Hawaii. I listened as a Habitat homeowner told her story and watched the people in the room go red-eyed and sniffly.

I've had jobs before with good companies that hired good people, but I never felt the depth of emotion that I have for this company. For example, I was a Girl Scout as a child, Maggie and Joanna were Girl Scouts, and I worked for the local council for ten years. In all that time, I never had "green blood." I don't know what the equivalent term would be for Habitat lovers (surely not sawdust in your blood:-), but whatever it is, I have it. Actually, I have heard the term Habititus. Maybe that's what I have. All I know is that, like a life-changing love affair, it just keeps getting better every day.

P.S. If I have not already done so, I will be hitting you up for a contribution of your time and/or money, dear reader. Be prepared:-)

New favorite song - "Oxford Comma"

2008-02-06T19:04:00.000-06:00

Found this cool song on Neil Gaiman's blog this evening.

What is an Oxford Comma? It's what we call a serial comma. Follow the link if you were sleeping that day in 7th grade English class.

Can't understand the lyrics? Go here.

By the Grace of God...

2008-01-23T22:37:00.000-06:00

...I got the job of my dreams. I start tomorrow morning at 8 a.m. I'm very happy and hugely relieved.

To Pet or Not To Pet - UPDATED 1/23/08

2008-01-01T11:20:00.000-06:00

Updated on 1/23/08: Thomas O'Malley is now the man of the house here at Little House. He's snoozing away on my lap right now. Mostly he's good company, but sometimes he gets in my way. He says the same about me:-)

When I moved into the apartment in 2004, their pet deposit was $400 so I had to tell my beloved Thomas O'Malley that he couldn't go with me. Now he's looking to relocate so Wesley and I have sent out numerous emails to our cat-lover friends hoping some kind soul will take him in. Thomas, not Wesley:-)

I tried to avoid the idea of my taking him, and that worked for several days. Then, as I was brushing my teeth while looking out the bathroom window the other day, I saw a tabby cat walk across the lot next door. Was it a sign I could ignore? Not for long.

I know from experience that I'm capable of turning off my emotions and taking Thomas to a shelter or, God forbid, the pound. However, I've done many things in my life that I regret, and I don't wish to add to that list.

So, after some soul searching and discussing with Susie's spokesperson, I'm thinking the right thing to do is welcome Thomas into Little House. Stay tuned...

Depp + Sondheim + Rickman + Bonham-Carter = The Perfect Movie!?

2007-12-17T18:18:00.000-06:00

Three years this coming Sunday

2007-12-13T18:15:00.000-06:00

I'm Still Alive

2007-12-08T18:10:00.000-06:00

No, I didn't post this video as a statement of my well being. Rather, I found it on Neil Gaiman's site and am quite taken with the music.

My fungus

2007-12-02T15:13:00.001-06:00

Could it be one of those valuable truffles I hear about on the news? Worth thousands of $$$$$?

Introducing Dagan

2007-11-26T21:55:00.000-06:00

Please welcome Dagan Wesley Lewis Smith!

Born Nov. 16, 2007, at 9:18 a.m.

9 lbs. 12 oz.

20 inches long

Proud parents Joanna and Danny now have TWO precious little boys.

His big brother Dalton loves him very, very much - as does the rest of his family:-)

Yeppers, for those of you keeping score: That makes 3 grandchildren in less than two years.
And Maggie & Adam are expecting a little sibling for Annabella in early May '08!

The Middle Class Job...

2007-11-09T11:27:00.000-06:00

...is very hard to find. Did you know an interview lasting one hour and 40 minutes with the VP of a major natural gas company does not necessarily mean you got the job. Did you know the hiring manager in a large company no longer knows what the salary is for the job you're interviewing for? In this day and age it's very easy to be over qualified for many jobs and under qualified for the others. Also, they can run a credit check and criminal background check on me, but I cannot do the same on them. The job candidate should be able to interview her potential co-workers before accepting the job. And that's all I'm going to say on the subject.

Roses and Vodka

2007-10-08T19:54:00.001-05:00

I wonder how old this rose bush is

Happy Hour @ 517

Go Army!

2007-10-01T20:39:00.001-05:00

Just like nuns, sometimes Army guys travel in pairs. Last week, while I was at work, two Army guys came over and worked on my house. Eat your heart out, girlfriends! They performed bug control (hurray) in the bathroom and replaced posts on my deck. How cool is that?! GO ARMY!

My Favorite Plumber

2007-09-30T21:31:00.000-05:00

Dear Readers,

Gee whillickers(sp?) it's been a long time since I posted. And I owe a loooooong overdue tribute to the best landlord and landlady in the land. Mike and Susan have not only been great friends as usual, turns out they are excellent neighbors and landlords.

Mike has spent countless hours over here working on the plumbing. Now, thanks to his efforts, I have new hardware in the shower, a brand new toilet (see below), drains that empty quickly, and an outside hydrant that doesn't leak.

Susan even took on the unenviable task of buying someone else (me) a toilet paper holder. Can you imagine doing that for someone else? Do you have any idea how many choices there are out there?

Coming soon.....the Army to the rescue!!!!!

Little House of Footprints

2007-07-31T10:33:00.000-05:00

I was laying in bed Saturday morning, exhausted but exhilarated after a full day of moving on Friday, looking at my 10 foot ceiling and noticed I have three smoke alarms in my bedroom. I reckon two are leftovers from previous tenants and one is fairly new. I realized my little house has footprints of other people wandering around its rooms and gardens.

Some of the footprints go up the south exterior wall where two satellite dishes now perch. The newbie is at the roof's peek where it reaches to the stars and brings me such delights as Saving Grace and the ubiquitous reruns of Friends.

And last night the best footprints of all were laid by Annabella Blue as she discovered she can run round and round in circles through the floor plan of this old house. Welcome, Annie. Come again soon!

Stuff Moving Day

2007-07-26T09:44:00.001-05:00

Tomorrow is moving day. Yippee! Big, strong, hunky, young men to move all my stuff. Most of my stuff anyway. I will still have stuff in the storage building, stuff in Susan's dining room, stuff in Susan's guest closet, stuff in Colburn's house, and stuff in the back seat and trunk of my car. George Carlin knows all about stuff. Watch the video here.